kaleidescope.

Growing up is a scary thing --
from skinned knees to bruised hearts,
from running through the sprinklers
to running to far-away parts
that change and shift into a kaleidescope
of colors, you see, that mirror life.
Growing tall is a dangerous thing --
you hit your head on the bunk bed,
you lose your favorite jeans to capris,
it's harder and harder to keep you fed
with physical and spiritual food alike
as you dodge the flying bullets of life.
Growing in love is a hurtful thing --
do you trust him, do you flee,
do the hidden parts of you manage
to become seen, to break free
and explain who you are inside?
Because the one who stays through
memories is the one who stays for life.

thoughts.scribblings.mine.theirs.

Yearly.
if summer is the season of one's spirit,
and autumn the season of one's mind,
then winter is the time for one's body to unwind,
and spring the time to lift one again, for fear it
is lost in the yearly progression of moments.
.:hdh:.

"If God makes a way, it'd be a sin to stay;
if God closes a door, a fool asks for more."
Ryan McDarmind.

Come Out.
"if you fly away, i'll with you stay,
forever & ever again, with you in Never-land.
instead of telling stories, i could be your story,
forever & ever again, with you in Never-land ..."
.:hdh:.

"The grass isn't greener on the other side. Sorry.
If you want green grass ... Start watering your lawn."
Doug Fields.

Portland.
finding souls in the city is
rather more difficult than
finding souls in the vineyard.
the city is distracting, bustling,
caffeine-dripped.
the vineyard is quiet, calming,
dew-dropped.
but it is not the vineyard
where souls collide --
the Garden of Olives, where
decisions are made,
and the city, where
hearts are altered,
collide in the vineyard
of my memories.
i need to take the vineyard,
and the Garden of Olives,
and live in this city.
.:hdh:.

"But none of this was in my grand plan!
None of this is what I wanted in life!"
"Sometimes life has different plans for us,
than what we wanted. That's life."
Marley&Me.

"Now faith is being sure of what we hope for,
and certain of what we do not see."
Hebrews 11:1

Popsicles

I don't know if you noticed,
but our childhood has flown by.
I don't know how it happened -
it was in the blink of an eye.
Somehow, I lost my wide-eyed innocence;
dolls are replaced by cars and other joys.
My mind and my efforts pursue different
choices than picking out my favorite toys.
I can remember summers long past
of fighting to catch the very last drop
of Popsicles before they melt and
land at my feet with a 'plop.'
I don't understand it; I vowed
to never grow up. But I guess
Never-never Land truly is
only imaginary pixie dust.
So choose your happy thought, hold it very tight -
and never give up Popsicles without a fight.

break free.

broken promise, broken dream -- he
told me what my heart could believe.
and believe I did, despite the
signs, ready as always, to turn the
tide. I need to bide my time. to
realize that there is one (of so few!)
to keep his promise, to grant my
dream, to shield me from the sigh
that inevitably escapes in relief
as soon as he starts to speak,
"I'm sorry." once he apologizes, he
has given his only gift to me --
a slightly more bruised and battered,
but ever more walled and guarded,
heart. distrust, it seems, has claimed me.
but someday I will break free.

untitled.

"... just to trust You."
that's a simple thing to say, to think,
but sometimes I find that it is difficult to
maintain, to keep a grip on it in the thick
of life. I shudder when life says, 'boo,'
when life throws a twist into my path
that forces me to turn my eyes back to You.
to turn them back -- that's a laugh.
I should never have lost sight of the true
guidance that I can find in the only steady
and straight aspect of my twisting and blue
tinted, frustrating life. I think I'm ready,
God, ready to trust in You, to see You
now as I should have been all along,
to realize that my take on what I see as new
is in actuality only true when I fall headlong
into this simple fact: that I belong with You.